Attention United Airlines passengers

December 1 2004

What I wish they had said a few hours ago at O'Hare...

Attention all passengers on United Airlines #317, delayed service to Des Moines:  Your flight will now board at 10:25 PM, with an expected departure of 10:50 PM.  This is one hour behind schedule.  It's a late enough flight to begin with, you should be pretty tired and ready to sleep by the time you get in your seat.  It's a light load tonight, so if you are planning to gab with the person you met in the departure lounge, please take a seat next to them and not across the aisle. That way, you won't have to shout to be heard.  It's only a 52 minute flight anyway, so wouldn't it be nicer instead if you'd STFU and nap like everyone else on the flight?  I'd bet the other passengers around you would appreciate it, especially when you are talking so loud that you can be heard through their combo of earplugs and noise-cancelling headphones.  Thank you for flying the friendly skies.

Ed Brill Des Moines, Iowa USA Category:  Travel  Add/View Comments [8]

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  1. 1  Colin Williams http://www.guttedgeek.com | 12/1/2004 3:16:33 AM

    LOL! Sorry Ed, at your expense!

  1. 2  Ben Rose http://blog.jaffacake.net | 12/1/2004 6:32:43 AM

    Hmmm, nice flight then?

  1. 3  Yury Kats  | 12/1/2004 7:19:59 AM

    This approach to comminication - shouting across an aisle - is something I see A LOT in the US. People try to stay as far away from each other as possible to carry on a conversation. Must be one of those cultural differences :) Very annoying!

  1. 4  jonvon http://jonvon.net | 12/1/2004 8:50:19 AM

    very nice sir...

  1. 5  Ted Niblett  | 12/1/2004 10:17:26 AM

    I've invoked him on airplanes a few times myself...

  1. 6  Christopher Byrne http://www.controlscaddy.com/ | 12/1/2004 10:42:43 AM

    But what if it was heidi klume?:-)

  1. 7  Dan  | 12/1/2004 10:48:46 AM

    "the other passengers around you would appreciate it"

    'other passengers'...'other passengers'... 'huh'.. 'other passengers' ... 'no, I don't get it'.

  1. 8  Ed Brill www.edbrill.com | 12/1/2004 9:10:43 PM

    if it was Heidi Klume, she'd have been in first class.

    And I would have regretted pressing the "No" button when the self check-in kiosk asked, "Would you like to purchase a first class upgrade for $63?"